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On the lighter side:
Once upon a hippo there was a family of leeches, who were the most profitable leeches in the land, dwelling as they did on the back of a hippo. The eldest daughter was a beautiful little nematode, with slimy skin, and four gorgeous eyes. She was the blood clot of her father's eyes, and all the leeches expected Princess Slimeola would certainly marry the most desirable of the river's leech Princes who would certainly line up in anticipation of her coming of age. As luck would have it, however, Slimeola was already in love with the palace jester, a common leech with no royal blood, (at least not his own) and no impeccable mannerisms to speak of.
Her father, King Suxalot, refused to allow his daughter to marry a leech of low means, and told Slimeola in straight, hard terms. Princess Slimeola rebelled against her father, and eloped with the jester. They swam for days, before taking residence on the back of a crocodile, where they began their own little colony of blood suckers. Things went fine for years, til one day the croc took a sunbath, and all the leeches in the little colony perished, along with the jester and Slimeola.
The moral is:
No matter how much things suck, or you suck, it can always suck worse.
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