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If you are scared to tell your parents, then talk to another responsible adult - one that will tell you WHY YOU ARE VERY WRONG TO EVEN CONSIDER IT. This is not trying to preach to you or judge you - it's just looking at the cold, hard facts. Having a baby at 14 is an extreme risk to your health - it can literally kill you. According to UNFPA and the World Health Organization, girls age 15 through 19 are twice as likely to die during pregnancy or child birth as those over age 20; girls under age 15 are five times more likely to die. Even if it doesn't kill you it can cause permanent health problems. That doesn't even begin to cover all the economic and social problems that will result.

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Wouldn't you want to wait until you're older? I'm your age, and there is no way I could raise a child. By having a child, you are giving up your teenage social life because you won't have time. You will not get as much sleep. Your grades will suffer. Also, remember that while babies are cute, they also grow up to be moody and act up. Do you want to be responsible for the growth of someone else while you are still growing?

If you are 'thinking' about having a baby at 14, you are not thinking! How are you going to pay for a baby? Not to mention how are you going to pay for your support for the rest of your life? Going to find free child care so you can finish middle school and then go to high school so you can hope to have something better than a minimum wage job?

Not to mention sexual intercourse at such a young age is illegal. In most States it is statutory rape and in others it is illegal sexual contact.

ANSWERWhy do you want to have a baby now your only 14 you have the rest of your life for that. Having a baby is a huge commitment that should not be taken lightly. A baby will look to you for everything--and babies need constant love and nurturing for their brain to grow properly. How are you going to support it as your not even entitled to state benefits at your age? You should definitely wait until you have finished school settled down with the right person and have accommodation and a regular income of your own. In the meantime I suggest you visit your doctor for the contraceptive pill.

Reasons not to have a baby at 14:

  • Babies need constant attention and loving care - which you are NOT mature enough to provide
  • They need it from YOU, and they need a full-time father, too. Your parents ARE NOT your baby-sitting service!
  • If you have a baby your education will suffer. You may still go to school, but once it is at home that baby is your responsibility and then you will have to fit time into your heavy schedule to study for tests at school.
  • You will no longer be free to hang out with your girlfriends; go to movies whenever you want or parties. You're face will be pressed up against that window of your parent's home watching all the other kids you know have a fun time, while you are at home looking after your baby as well as keeping your studies up. Without an education you can't get a good enough job to bring up your baby.
  • Babies are not dolls! You don't just take them off the shelf, dust them off and play with them. Babies need 24/7 care and you are selfish to think that your parents should pick up the slack while you are at school (the responsibility will probably lay 100% on your mother.)
  • Babies get colic; fevers, diarrhea, go off their food, can cry through the night, vomit (you'll be changing a lot of diapers and changing the baby's clothing more than you will ever know.) You just can't let the baby cry. They need you to respond to their needs, this is an important developmental period for their brain. Sometimes you will need to watch them all night long when they are sick. What are you going to do if your baby is ill? Expect your parents to pay for the medical bills? Your boyfriend is either your age or perhaps a year or two older so he won't be financially sound enough to provide medical help for the baby which is very expensive.
  • It is not right to knowingly get pregnant at your age (mistakes do happen) and expect tax payers to pick up the tab should your parents not want to look after a baby ... did you ever think of that!
  • If your boyfriend doesn't know you want a baby then it's wrong to get pregnant on purpose without discussing it with him. He may think it's a great idea, but you'll soon find out that once that baby is born and you both realize what a tough road is ahead of you he may well leave the situation and being so young he won't be able to support you or the baby and the stress and added expense will land on your parent's shoulders. As for any dreams you have had for your life? Forget them. You won't have time to work toward them until your child has grown.

Generally when a young person wants to have a baby they feel they are not loved as much as they should be ... something is missing and so they feel they can transfer their love onto a baby that will love them back. Having children is a wonderful thing and child birth a miracle in itself, but not when you are a child yourself. You are not mentally or physically prepared to give birth and raise a child.

Please go onto the internet and learn more about parenthood and what all the responsibilities are that go with it. Learn from chats (such as Wiki s here under teen pregnancies) what other young teens say about having a baby too soon. Most wish they'd never gotten pregnant.

You are a fine young person and I'm betting you are smarter than this. Now that some of us have given our views on this subject and you read the experiences of others under 'teen pregnancy' on Wiki s that you'll be smart enough to wait until you are older. Don't waste your young life and enjoy your teen years because they go by so quickly. Once your teen years are over reality sets in and statistically speaking about 50 - 60 years of reality shoved up your nose. Don't blow it by getting pregnant!

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8y ago
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13y ago

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To confirm whether you're pregnant or not, you need to take a pregnancy test. You can buy one at the supermarket or chemist or you can get one done at the doctor's. If it's positive, it is important that you book an appointment to see your doctor so that you and your baby can receive healthcare.

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You can contact Planned Parenthood in your area and have a test taken. They will then present your choices; keep it, give it away for adoption or have an abortion.

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13y ago

Talk to your parents or a trusted adult.

Make sure you do what ever you choose to do because you want to and not because you're force to.

You need to tell the father as well as both of your parents.

You can also contact Planned Parenthood to find out your options:

You need to see a doctor or midwife to check everything is going OK and you need to start taking pre-natal vitamins. Make sure you eat a healthy, balanced diet, get plenty of sleep, drink plenty of water and avoid too much stress and anxiety (even though this is difficult).

You will need to decide what you want to do. There are 3 main options:

Adoption - there are many, many people out there who would love a baby but for some reason don't or can't have one. You can have an open adoption or a closed adoption. An open adoption is where you can still be in contact (either personally or through letters, emails and photos) with your baby and his/her adoptive family after the option. Please be aware, however, that the people adopting your baby are under no legal obligation to keep it as an open adoption once the papers have been signed. Many people (adoptive families) then decide to close the adoption and there is nothing you can do to stop them. A closed adoption is where you do not have contact with your baby and their adoptive family. If you choose adoption, please make sure that you choose a reputable organization who are open, honest and legal. Don't be fooled into thinking adoption is the easy way out - any option you choose regarding your baby will be difficult.

Keeping your baby - although this is difficult, it can be done. If you want to keep your baby, don't let other people tell you that you can't. Before deciding to keep your baby, take into consideration everything involved with raising a child - remember that your baby won't stay a baby forever. Take into consideration, the costs of clothing, food, education, housing and other items that are needed for a baby or child. However, do not think that just because you do not have the money for these things, you cannot keep your baby. There are many organisations that can help with money, accommodation, toys and clothing.

There is Medicaid and low cost housing. There is catholic charities orphanages and homes for pregnant teens. Learn how to budget and stick to it. There is also the issue of school. At 14, you will still need to stay in school. There are many day care places that your child could be looked after at while you are in school. Sometimes schools even have their own day care. For some people, their own parents are at home during the day and feel that they would be open to looking after the baby/child during the day. Do not put all responsibility on your own parents though - this is your child

Abortion - this may or may not be an option, depending on how far along you are and your own beliefs about abortion. Abortions can normally be performed up until around 20-24 weeks. Please note that this is also not the easy way out. It can be painful and you can get an infection. Many people often feel guilty about getting an abortion afterwards which is normal but passes. If you do get an abortion, please make sure that you stick to check-ups afterwards to make sure everything is healing properly and make sure you get some counseling and tell an adult you can trust about the abortion. If you have properly though through getting an abortion and are serious about it, go and speak to your doctor and they can arrange it for you

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13y ago

Scared or not - it's better you tell them before it's too late ! You have a choice whether to continue the pregnancy, or have a termination. If you decide to carry on, you need to decide whether to keep the baby or put it up for adoption. You CANNOT make these decisions on your own - and will have to tell your parents eventually.

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Q: What should you do if you are 14 and pregnant?
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