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You can fuss, moan, gripe and complain about him and to him.. Chances are, it won't do any good. Or you can figure out what problems you have with him and work with him to change the issue. Frequently our "problems" with husbands are the result of our being over tired and frustrated with our own daily problems. That same husband who will slay dragons and leap to the moon for you... doesn't remember that the garbage must be taken out on Tuesdays and Fridays before 7am. It's not his fault, he's built to solve problems, not run a household. That one is our job..his is to love us and wonder what makes us happy. Husbands work best on the "kill this, pay that" operational system. They love clear simple directions. Let's face it, we as women over analyze problems. Men don't usually do that..."kill this, pay that"! If you develop a plan to get things done on this principle, you'll be much happier and so will he. Truly, men do not need OR WANT to relate to you in everyday matters on a deeper level. They really don't care that the roach needs to be killed because it spreads germs, they just want to know that you need it killed. So figure out what he needs to do for you...and tell him! He's not a mind reader, even after all these years. Since the question isn't entirely clear on this point... If your husband is malicious, demanding, hurtful, and/or abusive, seek help immediately. You are a valuable person and these behaviors are not love, they are power tools to control you. Abuse is never love, it is control by force. You deserve a life of love not abuse, so seek help for both of you. Right now, today!

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βˆ™ 16y ago
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βˆ™ 16y ago

* If he is not around as much as you would like him to be don't second guess the fact he is seeing another woman. Communication is so important so confront him and try to calmly talk this situation over. If he denies it or you already know he is seeing another woman then he has no respect for your feelings and there is absolutely no excuse for cheating because he could confront you about it and end the marriage. You could hire a detective to follow him on the days or weekends you feel he is seeing the other woman (generally takes one weekend to get the evidence) or, you could take a friend along with you and follow him and catch him in the act, then file for divorce. If you think by catching him and he comes back to you don't think the worst is over because you will never trust him again and there will always be a wedge between you. If you have children and feel you want to stay with him for the sake of the children this is the worst decisions you could make. Children know when something is wrong (adults are human and can't always control their feelings so arguments over cheating and the hurt you feel will over flow) and children often blame themselves for these arguments.

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Q: What can you do about your husband seeing another woman?
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