How does an abused daughter break the pattern of dating abusive men?

Answer 1

there is no hard and fast way to break these patterns...however if you find a skilled relationship counsellor to help you understand why it happens (though the answers are inside you just need help to recognise and see them) and take time out of any relationship and just find time to get to know yourself, your likes and dislikes, address your own needs, look after and care for yourself, try to learn to like yourself, validate your own self-worth by being with friends, people who like and respect you...all of this is stuff I've done and it works...but it takes time and willingness not to be needy and take 'what you can get' rather than what you really deserve....in other words it takes hard work....good luck

I dont understand how to use this site perfectly yet. Please excuse. Ive just added mine on to the last persons response. Hope that's Ok.

MY ANSWER IS:- I became a 'sex & love addict myself, through seeking the solution to my pains ans emptiness, via relationships. My relationships degenerated to dreadful ones with sometimes abusive men, other times just emotionally unavailable men. I crossed an invisible line somewhere along the way-by this I mean I COULD NOT STOP doing the samre thing over & over once I wanted to- the definition of an addict. I attempted suicide in the middle of the most abusive one- and then got away- and proceeded into an addiction to another man!! I was powerless over my behaviour.

I was told her story by a similar woman who had recovered, via working the STEPS of Sex and Love Addicts anonymous-(S.L.A.A). I entered that program, & by turning the spotlight on myself, I am now abstinent from such behaviour. I am facing the void in myself that led me to do these insane things, with the help of others in the program & a higher power. I have seen others recover from horrific repetitive lifestyles also. I have had friends suicide over this stuff. If you're interested- S.L.A.A meetingsare all over the U.S.A, Australia, & other countries. They have a website, & online meetings. A TIP- Thier SLAA Handbook, the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous(which they use to work the styeps to recover form addiction,and the taking of the steps are the way I see people recover & change- not by meetings alone. I wish you all the very best.