Office have not been released for android. You can use apps like GoogleDrive.

no they use the googledrive cloud server system to store files

There is many good reliable and affordable online storage service provider give the online space for storing the data. There are some good options are present for online backup such as Mega, JustCloud, GoogleDrive, Copy, Bitcasa

the CIA have the ability to zap things with their lazer eyes

There are many websites available to help you with photo archiving. One possibility would be to use online cloud storage type websites, such as DropBox or GoogleDrive. These sites allow you to store a large amount of information securely and they offer both free and paid premium packages depending on your needs.